原文与参考译文
在民间传说中,城隍,是守护国家、城池之神,也是主管奖善惩恶、生死祸福等的司法神,通俗的说法就是阴间的地方官。广州都城隍庙始建于1370年,距今已有640多年的历史。广州都城隍庙是明清时期广州城内的标志性建筑,曾被评为清代“羊城八景”之一,盛极一时。
In the folklore, Town God is the guardian of country, protecting the city under his administration. At the meantime, he is the God of justice in charge of rewarding good and punishing evil, deciding life & death and happiness & disasters. In other words, Town God is the regional governor, in the netherworld.Guangzhou Du Town God Temple was founded in 1370, with a history of over 640 years. It was a landmark architecture of Guangzhou during Ming and Qing Dynasties, once flourished as one of the Eight Sceneries in Guangzhou.
广州都城隍庙是道教场所,不仅宣扬中国传统道教文化,也宣扬中国传统道德规范,同时也寄托了大众对正义的向往。在现代社会中,城隍文化将更加丰富,重拾城隍记忆,重视尊老、养老、互助的精神,以利于社会的和谐发展。
The temple is a ritual venue of Taoism. It distributes Chinese Taoist culture and advocates traditional moral norms. Not only that, it shows people’s desire and pursuit of justice.In modern society, the culture of Town God is further enriched and the memory of Town God comes back. It is about respecting the senior aged, providing for the aged and helping one another. All this is good for harmonious development of the society.
详细解析及错误分析
1在民间传说中,城隍,是守护国家、城池之神,也是主管奖善惩恶、生死祸福等的司法神,通俗的说法就是阴间的地方官。
In the folklore, Town God is the guardian of country, protecting the city under his administration. At the meantime, he is the God of justice in charge of rewarding good and punishing evil and deciding life & death and happiness & disasters. In other words, Town God is the regional governor, in the netherworld.
解析:这句话乍眼一看好像很复杂,其实细细剖析结构很明确: 城隍就两个身份,第一是守护国家的神,第二是司法神。(“主管……”可以用in charge of…)阴间的地方官这一句是对前面两个身份的进一步说明。因此,参考译文将这种层次处理为三个句子,十分清晰明了。在这里要注意以下不要漏译,“奖善惩恶”就是奖励那些做了好事的,惩罚那些做了坏事的,英文里面就有现成的表达“rewarding good and punishing evil”,至于“生死祸福”,要补充一下动词就是“decide”,也是定夺人们的生和死,祸和福。
同学译句01
1、 Town god, in the Chinese folk tales, is the god to safeguard the nations and charge the penalty. In a simple way, town god is the magistrate of the underworld. (Kinsley)
分析:charge the penalty收取罚款??这里实在是看不懂。该同学的译文实在是漏译了太多内容了,漏译在考试里面扣分是很严重的,希望同学们能够引以为戒,不要随便省略掉原文的内容。
2、 In folklore, Chenghuang temple is the god of guarding city and country as well as the judicial god in charge of rewarding the good and punishing the evil, the fate of life and death, etc. That's the local official of the underworld.(Nico)
分析:注意一下,城隍庙和城隍是不一样的,不要想所以然,城隍是一种神,城隍庙就是人们修建的供奉这个神的庙宇。城隍庙本身是不会守护城池的,城隍这个神才会守护。city和country并不是并列的关系,所以处理为guarding city and country并不好。
这里我们可以理解为一个国家是由很多个城池构成,所以像参考译文那么处理就很妥当,因为城隍首先是the guardian of country,所以他才会进一步去protecting the city。这个同学把两个身份用as well as连接,其实并不够妥当。
因为as well as常用来连接两个并列的成分,作“也,还”解,它强调的是前一项,后一项只是顺便提及,如Your wife as well as you is friendly to me.除了你,你的妻子也对我很友好,这句话里面就强调是你的妻子。所以,大家对于这个as well as切勿滥用,因为原文的守护神和司法神就是并列关系,并没有强调谁,你用and还更为恰当。
2广州都城隍庙始建于1370年,距今已有640多年的历史。广州都城隍庙是明清时期广州城内的标志性建筑,曾被评为清代“羊城八景”之一,盛极一时。
Guangzhou Du Town God Temple was founded in 1370, with a history of over 640 years. It was a landmark architecture of Guangzhou during Ming and Qing Dynasties, once flourished as one of the Eight Sceneries in Guangzhou.
解析:原文中的“盛极一时”其实就是描述城隍庙作为标志性建筑,被评为八景之一这件事,是城隍庙有史以来的一件很鼎盛的事情。参考译文将其处理为flourished as(繁荣发展)十分恰当贴切。
我们可以都看看一些例句来体会一下flourish的用法:(1)Since then it has flourished as a port and a center of demand-led, free-market economics.
自此之后,该地经济蓬勃发展,不但成为港口,而且是一个由需求带动的自由市场经济中心。
(2)It flourished as a trade center from the 4th-century b. c. until its capture by the Romans in a. d. 106.
从公元前4世纪直到公元106年被罗马人占领,它一直是一个繁华的贸易中心。
同学译句02
1、 Guangzhou Chenghuang Temple has been over 640 years since built in 1370. It was the landmark building in Guangzhou in Ming and Qing Dynasty, which was known as one of “the eight scenes in Ram City”, in fashion for a period. (Sky)
分析:该同学语法不过关,第一句很明显就是错误的,这种低级错误在考试里面也是非常致命的,应该改为: It has been 640 years since Guangzhou Chenghuang Temple was founded in 1370. 此外,dynasty 没有加复数。Which was known as也让人一头雾水,这个which到底是指什么?建议改为Known as one of the…, it was the landmark…。
此外,in fashion也不对,in fashion是指流行,和“盛极一时”差得远了。这样的译文硬伤太多,实在难以打上一个及格的分数。
2、 Guangzhou Chenghuang Temple was founded in 1370, about 640 years ago. Awarded with one of “The Eight Views of Ram City” in Qing dynasty, the temple was the landmark of Guangzhou city in the period of Ming and Qing dynasty. (A.D.1368-1912). (Cassie)
分析:原文“距今已有640多年的历史”的潜台词其实就是,城隍庙历史悠久,该同学处理为“Guangzhou Chenghuang Temple was founded in 1370, about 640 years ago”则把这一内涵翻译得荡然无存。in the period of Ming and Qing dynasty简化为in Ming and Qing Dynasties就行了。
3广州都城隍庙是,不仅宣扬中国传统道教文化,也宣扬中国传统道德规范,同时也寄托了大众对正义的向往。The temple is a ritual venue of Taoism. It advocates Chinese Taoist culture and traditional moral norms. Not only that, it shows people’s desire and pursuit of justice.
同学译句03
1、 Guangzhou City God is the place of Taoism, where people put their hanker for justice, not only preaching Chinese traditional Taoism culture, but also the Chinese traditional moral. (Alison)解析:该同学的句法意识还不错,可惜的是,put one’s hanker没有这么用的,查查语料库,没有人这么用过。
因此,前面一句建议改为:Guangzhou Town God Temple, a place of Taoism, is the embodiment of people’s hankers for justice.
4在现代社会中,城隍文化将更加丰富,重拾城隍记忆,重视尊老、养老、互助的精神,以利于社会的和谐发展。
In modern society, the culture of Town God is further enriched and the memory of Town God comes back. It is about the spirits of respecting the senor aged, providing for the aged and helping one another. All this is good for harmonious development of the society.
分析:“在现代社会中,城隍文化将更加丰富”意思是在现代社会城隍文化将会被赋予更多新的内涵,即“重视尊老、养老、互助的精神”。所以参考译文用了“It is about”。这一段原文看似支离破碎,其实内涵、条理十分清晰:在现代社会,我们在城隍文化中加入重视尊老、养老、互助的精神,这件事是有利于社会的和谐发展的。
大家在中译英的时候,大不必被原文的形式吓倒,有时候中文里面就有很多支离破碎的语言,再加上各种成语,就显得很难的样子。我们要透过形式,看透这句话最本质的内涵和逻辑关系,用最简洁的英语翻译出来。
被动句篇
前言被动句的广泛使用是英语不同于汉语的一个特点。汉语中虽然也有被动句,但使用范围较窄,许多被动意义的句子是用无主语的形式来表达的。英语被动句的译 法比较灵活,本次练习以十个句子为例,希望抛砖引玉,对同学们的翻译有所启发:
原题1. The Senate appropriation subcommittee had no knowledge on this and had not been consulted on those reported plans.
2. The conductor appeared on the stage and was warmly applauded by the audience.
3. Arafat was bitterly criticized within the Palestine ranks for trusting US guarantees that civilian left in the camps would not be harmed.
4. The economies of Iran and Iraq were greatly undermined by the protracted hostilities and losses in manpower and material values.
5. US concern for the affairs in Central America was demonstrated by the presence of the battleship Iowa off the coast of Honduras.
6. The pigs have been fed.
7. It is believed to be natural that more and more engineers have come to prefer synthetic material to natural material.
8. The Statue of Liberty was presented to the United States of America in the nineteenth century by the people of France.
9. Wrongs must be righted when they are discovered.
10. He said he was assured by the State Department that the U.S. is willing to normalize relations with his country.
1The Senate appropriation subcommittee had no knowledge on this and had not been consulted on those reported plans.
参议院拨款小组委员会对此一无所知,也没有人就传闻 中的计划与该小组委员会进行过磋商。
解析:英语被动句的使用要比汉语广泛得多,因此,大量的英语被动句都可译为汉语的主动句,这句话就是典型的被动句转化为汉语的主动句。 2The conductor appeared on the stage and was warmly applauded by the audience.乐团指挥 出现在舞台,听众报以热烈的掌声。
同学译句01
指挥员出现在舞台上,受到了观众的热烈鼓掌。(Joyce)点评:这位同学就没有适时将被动句式转化为主动句式,从而导致翻译出来的东西翻译腔极其浓烈。“受到了观众的热烈鼓掌”恐怕不像是一句“人话”。注意,conductor在这里是乐团的指挥,而不是某些同学翻译的所谓“领导”,这些同学翻译成“领导”,简直是令人啼笑皆非,也暴露了这些同学不勤于查词、求证。
3Arafat was bitterly criticized within the Palestine ranks for trusting US guarantees that civilian left in the camps would not be harmed.
阿拉法特在巴勒斯坦武装内部受到严厉批 评,因为他轻信了美国关于留在难民营中的平民不会遭到伤害的保证。解析:在英语中,被动结构常用来表述一个动作。这时,句中的受动者或by词组表 明的施动者(如果有的话)均降到了次要地位。在翻译这类被动句时,可以用 “被 ”、“受 ”、“遭到 ”、“为 … …所 ” 等词语来表达,使译文突出原文的被动动作。
4The economies of Iran and Iraq were greatly undermined by the protracted hostilities and losses in manpower and material values.
伊朗和伊拉克的经济由于长期的战争以及人力物资的损失而遭到巨大的破坏。解析:这句话如果死译为“经济被战争及人力物资的损失破坏了”则显然有些拗口,我们大可灵活处理,把by处理为“因为,由于”,就像参考译文一样。当然,有些同学干脆处理为主动句,也是可以的。
5US concern for the affairs in Central America was demonstrated by the presence of the battleship Iowa off the coast of Honduras.衣阿华号战列舰在洪都拉斯沿海出现,表明了美国对中美洲事务的关注。解析:这句话里面也有by,和第四句话类似,但是这里我们可以灵活处理,不必像上一句那样处理为“因为,由于”。
同学译句02
在洪都拉斯海岸的爱荷华州出现的战舰引起了美国对于中美洲事件的关注。(何同学)点评:该同学理解错了demonstrate的意思了,demonstrate的意思我们通过查字典,得知是 to show or prove something clearly,所以这个something是本来就存在的,而demonstrate则是将这个something清晰地证明或者证明给别人看。所以,美国对中美洲事务本来就是比较关注的,而现在战舰的出现,则是进一步证明、表明了这一点。
6The pigs have been fed.猪已经喂完了。
解析:有些同学会翻译成“猪已经被喂完了”,其实中文里面,很多时候,不用“被”字,被动的意义也还是在的,比如我们经常说“小说已经出版了”“灯已经关了”,而不是“小说已经被出版了”“灯已经被关了”,后者显得十分呆板。有时候同学们被英文原文束缚了,中文的那种呆板表达一下子就出来,大家一定要注意一下。
7It is believed to be natural that more and more engineers have come to prefer synthetic material to natural material.
愈来愈多的工程人员宁愿用合成材料而不用天然材料,人们相信这是很自然一件事。解析:汉译时,我们可以增加适当的施事,即原英语被动句中没有施事, 译成汉语主动句时, 可以从逻辑出发, 适当增添不确定的施事, 如“人们、有人、大家、我们”。通常状况下,某些要求复合宾语的动词(如 believe, consider, find, know, see, think)用于被动语态时, 翻译时经常可加上不确定的施事;由 it 作形式主语的英语被动句式,汉译时也可加不确定的施事。这句话同学们基本都能够翻译对,问题不大。
8The Statue of Liberty was presented to the United States of America in the nineteenth century by the people of France.自由神雕像是法国人民在十九世纪送给美国的。解析:汉语中常用“ ……是 ……的 ”这一句式来说明人和事物的客观情况。这种结构在语义上往往具有被动的含义。可以与英语中的被动结构相沟通。一般说来 , 英语中用来说明客观情况的被动句都可译为汉语的这一句式。
同学译句03
1、自由女神像于19世纪由法国人送去美利坚合众国。(Kris)
2、19世纪,法国人将自由女神像赠送给美国。(Alison)
点评:这两个同学的译文都不能说错,但又不能说完全对,因为仔细读读原文,主题其实还是在讨论一个关于“自由女神像”的客观事实,所以对比各种版本的译文,仍以参考译文的译法为佳。9Wrongs must be righted when they are discovered.发现了错误一定要改正。
解析:这句话是典型的将被动句译为汉语的无主句。汉语的句子可以不带主语,因 此无须说出行为主体时可以将英语的被动句译为汉语的无主句。一般来说英语中不带由by引导的短语并含有情态动词的被动句都可采用这种译法。10He said he was assured by the State Department that the U.S. is willing to normalize relations with his country.他说,国务院向他担保美国愿意同他的国家恢复正常关系。这句话也是典型将被动句译为主动句。
同学译句04
1、他表示,国家部门向他保证美国愿意正常化与他们国家的关系。(Jadyn)
点评:这位同学就有点翻译腔了,因为“正常化”在中文里面很少直接作动词,一般都是作名词,比如“中美邦交的正常化”。2、美国国务院向他保证,美国很乐意使两国关系正常化。(Cassie)
点评:这位同学就操之过急了,“两国”其中一国是我们知道是美国,所以另一国是哪国?这个译文让人看了一头雾水。直接直译为他的国家不就行了?
今天的讲解就到此结束啦,你学会了吗?
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