雅思G类大作文真题7分范文分析-行万里路

题目：Today more people are travelling than ever before.

Why is this the case?

What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller?

考官评语：考生英语水平很好，但是由于没有认真读题和合理分段而丢分。本文很好地回应了题目中的第一个问题，分析和讨论了远距离和当地出行增长的原因。但是完全没有回应题中提到的”对出行者的好处”，所以TR分数较低。行文有逻辑，观点之间连接流畅，但是没有分段，影响读者了解主要观点。语言表达丰富、自然、准确。没有明显的词汇或语法错误，只有标点和拼写方面的小错误。

题型：Report

关键词：more people, travelling, than before, why, benefits...for the traveller

简析：认真读题很重要。范文考生根本就没看到第二个问题。

而你，在考场上是否会只泛谈“出行的好处”而忽略了“对出行者好处”？——实际上，这是个伪问题，陷阱在于对‘travel’的理解。很多考生习惯把travel理解为“旅行”，甚至等同于“旅游”，然而在剑桥词典中，‘travel’的例句包括：

1.Between school and university, she spent a year travelling, mostly in Africaand Asia.中学毕业后，她在上大学以前花了1年时间旅行，主要是在非洲和亚洲。

2.I travel to work by train.  我乘火车上班。

3.He travelled over 1,000 miles to be at the wedding.他从1000多英里外过来参加婚礼。

此外，剑桥词典对‘traveller’的解释可能更有助于我们理解该词与旅游的关系：

This hotel is for serious travellers, rather than tourists on two-week holidays.这家旅馆接待真正热衷旅行的人士，而不是那些度假两星期的游客。

再来看朗文词典对‘travel’的英英解释：to go from one place to another, or to several places, especially ones that are far away。

由此可见，‘travel’是指长途的出行，有旅游的含义，但不完全是。

很多考生觉得自己写作丢分丢的莫名其妙，其实很可能就是因为没有充分回应题目提到的内容，和/或，对关键词会错了意。

此外，问题benefits是复数，因此要说2个以上，原因通常也要至少2个。针对题中的than ever before, 在展开论述过程中要注意描述变化，恰当使用时态以展示语法多样性。

以下为正文

Today more people are travelling than ever before. The reasons for this increase are many and varied.

On  a simplistic level, there are larger numbers of means of transportation
-  there are more cars, buses and trains in operation. However, the
sheer number of transportation means is not enough to explain this
increase. The cost of traveling even though it is at present increasing
due to an economic slowdown globally; is still relatively affordable to
many people. This affordability is further enhanced by the use of credit
cards and loans in order to fund travel, especially for holiday
purposes.

An  increase of travel companies in competition with each other has also
helped bring package prices down, while an increase in the number of
operating flights globally has also increased, giving rise to falling
air-fare prices. In addition, people now have more leisure time and
disposable incomes. The combination of these two variables with
unrelenting advertising campaigns from travel companies and cruise ship
operators arguably leads to an increase in the number of people
travelling, in this case for holiday purposes.

Another  reason why people travel is going to work. More than ever before,
people are travelling greater distances to get to work. Large industrial
sites fo both service and production industries are tending to be
located outside city areas. This invariably leads to increase in the
number of people travelling locally.

In  conclusion, there are many reasons why more people are travelling both
internationally and locally, for business and for leisure. What is sure
is that this increase is likely to continue until travelling at current
rates is no longer economically viable.

本文字数：271 words

观点与话题词汇整理
交通方式多样	means of transportation cars, buses and trains in operation
出行成本降低	the cost of travelling economic slowdown relatively affordable affordability credit cards loans for holiday purpose
企业价格竞争	travel companies package holiday 跟团游 air-fare prices机票价格
有闲有钱	leisure time more disposable incomes更多可支配收入 advertising campaigns广告宣传 cruise ship
上班远	travel great distances service industries 服务业 production industries 生产制造业 increase in 某方面的增长
不只学表达也是思考角度： both nationally and locally for business and for leisure